Lions and Tigers and Bedlamites, Oh My!

<div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; text-align: justify;"><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgi7vi0J0Ln0pIiI-eG66R0MMELboVbrmfbuHjTaWp0IAl9v_v80Bmk1jzyFSXlBFT7B3bRtpLTigdoN0N6IM0Xg05yDnEklWFzExDawU9TitT6fZ9URbMhu7z6DLFIrhImLlufZaU8o_4/s1600/1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; cssfloat: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" r6="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgi7vi0J0Ln0pIiI-eG66R0MMELboVbrmfbuHjTaWp0IAl9v_v80Bmk1jzyFSXlBFT7B3bRtpLTigdoN0N6IM0Xg05yDnEklWFzExDawU9TitT6fZ9URbMhu7z6DLFIrhImLlufZaU8o_4/s1600/1.jpg" /></a>First things first, we can’t say enough about how wonderful April 2011 <a href="http://lds.org/general-conference?lang=eng">General Conference</a> was this past weekend, we felt saved, sanctified and Holy Ghost filled! Now let’s get to <a href="http://lds.org/church/leader/jeffrey-r-holland?lang=eng&query=elder+holland">Elder Jeffrey R. Holland</a>! When Elder Holland made that hilarous remark about trying to hold <a href="http://lds.org/hf/fhe/welcome/0,16785,4210-1,00.html">Family Home Evening</a> inspite of the bedlam in a house reigned by little "bedlamlites," he had us rolling (urban translation, rolling: laughing extremely hard). The word Bedlamites is definitely getting added to the Mormon dictionary, right next to Nephites and Lamanites. </div></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"></div><br /><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; text-align: justify;">Bedlamites will now be the beloved word used to reference rambunctious children; it will be the loving way Primary teachers refer to their unruly pupils. Sunbeams and Bedlamites will probably now be interchangeable. We can see the t-shirts that Desert Book will start selling; “My Bedlamite is cuter than your Bedlamite,” “Lions and Tigers and Bedlamites, Oh My!” “Todays’ Bedlamite’s are tomorrow’s <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Two_thousand_stripling_warriors">Stripling Warriors</a>.” </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: justify;">Now, when we looked up bedlamite on Dictionary.com, (we were checking to see if the Church had copyrighted it yet, LDS folk get things done quick, fast and in a hurry) it said, and we quote “Bedlamite: an insane person; lunatic.” Yup, Elder Holland just politely called ya kids crazy!</div><br /><div style="text-align: justify;">Is there anyone out there who knows the art of politely telling it like it is better than the <a href="http://www.mormon.org/">Mormons</a> do? If you aren’t <a href="http://www.lds.org/">LDS</a> and a young man was to tell you that you’re daughter has a sweet spirit, you would probably be so flattered. Well don’t be, cause that means that boy thinks her personality is nice and all, but he’s not really feelin' her in the looks department. I know you can’t believe it, but that is what that sugar-coated comment actually means.</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: justify;">ESPN writer, <a href="http://espn.go.com/blog/rick-reilly-go-fish/post/_/id/869/rick-reilly-mailbag">Rick Reilly</a> recently wrote an <a href="http://espn.go.com/blog/rick-reilly-go-fish/post/_/id/869/rick-reilly-mailbag">article</a> about <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jimmer_Fredette">Jimmer Fredette</a> that some Mormons were upset about, this is what Rick had to say about the hate mail: “The best hate mail in America comes from <a href="http://www.byu.edu/">BYU</a> fans. Even when they're spitting 20-penny nails, they're still incurably nice. Alabama fans will write hoping you die a slow, painful death, staked to an anthill while your mom watches, but the worst a BYU fan will say to you is that you're not going to heaven.”</div><br /><div style="text-align: justify;">That’s how we roll. We LDS like to L-D-S (Let’em Down Sensitively). Rick Reilly, take a lesson from the Mormons next time you’re talking about Jimmer’s fans say something like, "I can’t believe all the Bedlam those BYU Bedlamites are causing", it may go over a little better. On the real, Elder Jeffrey R. Holland's talk was excellent, you can catch it <a href="http://lds.org/general-conference/watch/2011/04?lang=eng&vid=883477018001&cid=10">here</a>. And just in case some of you still don’t believe us about the phrase “sweet spirit,” here’s the lyrics to the song “Sweet Spirit” by <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sons_of_Provo">Sons of Provo</a>.</div><br /><iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="349" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/gJp9e0bFHQU?rel=0" title="YouTube video player" width="425"></iframe><br /><br />God Bless,<br />Sista Beehive & Sista Laurel

Lions and Tigers and Bedlamites, Oh My!

First things first, we can’t say enough about how wonderful April 2011 General Conference  was this past weekend, we felt saved, sanctified ...

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Nelly's Not The Prophet!!

<div style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; CLEAR: both" class="separator" align="left"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg7tgetCrLLkZ2p93OtSzLcAWR5zw0-4J3RTcAk-KEAyh53J5dYWJMv71kM7ASo-VUvmX9SlRhpuJjp2wUShM-V4DuGNIeuFM458xHKvvTeHey3ZAleGk0zlt4CebmCZ-nnEGz5HHLTuREb/s1600-h/2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="MARGIN-BOTTOM: 1em; FLOAT: left; CLEAR: left; MARGIN-RIGHT: 1em; cssfloat: left"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg7tgetCrLLkZ2p93OtSzLcAWR5zw0-4J3RTcAk-KEAyh53J5dYWJMv71kM7ASo-VUvmX9SlRhpuJjp2wUShM-V4DuGNIeuFM458xHKvvTeHey3ZAleGk0zlt4CebmCZ-nnEGz5HHLTuREb/s320/2.jpg" vr="true" /></a><br /></div><p>Brothas and Sistas, Nelly is a rapper not the Prophet! When he wrote the song: IT'S GETTING HOT IN HERE - SO TAKE OFF ALL YOUR CLOTHES, that was not a revelation and he was not taking to us. Really I should just say sistas cause the brothas are keeping their clothes on (even the pre and post mission clothes from 5 years ago... Shout out to brotha Stephen L , I kinda got your back, I said KINDA) :). Now this is something that ya'll won't hear at General Conference. Why you ask, cause the General Relief Society President is more like Aunt Bea and less like Madea. However, there's a few members of the church that are like **Madea and if you ever have the opportunity to meet them you will gain an immediate testimony of modesty, or want to leave the church.<br /><br />I know you're wondering how I know all this, and if I've had the opportunity to meet such refreshingly honest women... Well, let's just say I have a testimony of modesty! Yes, it was baptism by fire! No, there are no pictures! Yes, I feel blessed and highly favored! Yes, my feelings were hurt! No, I didn't leave the church. Yes sistas all is well in zion... Now!<br /><br />Stop trying to make things sexy that aren't. If a police woman walked up to my car to give me a ticket dressed the way some of the female officers dress for Halloween, I would have her arrested for sexual assualt. Nobody wants to see a pregnant nun, or stripper L.D.S. Missionary, it ain't cute! Sistas let's stop trying to make stuff sexy thats not sexy! Nurses, really? A maids costume? If your answer is yes, don't be surprised if your husband expects you to clean in that. When did animals become sexy? Animals... Really? Some of the most profound things I've learned in my adult life I've learned from my Madea. Who would probably tell us not to let Halloween turn nice housewives into modest hoes.<br /><br />It's time for us to return back to basics! Where being an animal meant being fully clothed. Dressing like a nurse meant if you walked into a hospital they'd put you to work. And dressing like a maid meant you looked like you could clean places where dirt and dust collected, not that you were trying to collect other peoples husbands. Sistas we have got to stop trying to look like "sexy teens", so that our teens won't be trying to look like "sexy women". We are all beautiful, and some of us really do have "sweet spirits". It's time that we once again proclaim, "I'm Mormon, I can't". No, let's switch that "I'm Mormon, I won't". I won't dress immodest, I won't be the Naughty Angel, no matter how heavenly it might seem. I won't embarrass my whole entire church by going on Dr. Phil (my own personal issue thought I'd throw it in). Sistas I'm not trying to throw ya'll under the bus, I'm just saying we have gotten outta control. Lets save something for our husbands in the privacy of our own homes. There's no need for us to try to solve all the unsolved mysteries of Halloween. Our new motto should be we are "treats not tricks" . Please stop telling folks " I'm a dead swimmer" so you can wear a bikini (Renee)!<br /><br />We don't really want our dear Prophet to have to address this issue again. Asking us how we went from being Celestial Wholesome Queens on the 30 of Oct., to Naughty, Naked, and Obscene on 31 of Oct. What a difference a day makes! I don't want President Monson calling Madea. Don't be fooled, the LDS Church has a couple different versions of Madea! Trust me, we got a Madea that speaks every language, even suburbia. What are your thoughts on Halloween? All caution has a cost - "I'm taking my garments off"!! Or does being modest make you spiritually strong - "I'm keeping my garments on"!<br /><br /><br />** (Mother Dear = usually grandma, sometimes an older woman in the community not always related. Almost always Black) is about to educate ya'll without putting you through the public humiliation. </p><p>Sista Beehive</p><p><br /><a href="http://www.myfreecopyright.com/registered_mcn/BT8QW_3GY41_YKT8E" title="MyFreeCopyright.com Registered & Protected"><img alt="MyFreeCopyright.com Registered & Protected" border="0" height="38" src="http://storage.myfreecopyright.com/mfc_protected.png" title="MyFreeCopyright.com Registered & Protected" width="145" /></a> </p>

Nelly's Not The Prophet!!

Brothas and Sistas, Nelly is a rapper not the Prophet! When he wrote the song: IT'S GETTING HOT IN HERE - SO TAKE OFF ALL YOUR CLOTHES, ...

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The Tie Game

<div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><u><span style="color: #b9b9b9;"></span></u>Today began the <a href="http://lds.org/conference/languages/0,6353,310-1,00.html">179th Semiannual General Conference of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints</a>. It also kicked off discussions all across the world of parents telling teenagers that the Saturday sessions are just as important as the Sunday sessions. When I was younger I didn't even know there were Saturday Conference sessions. All I knew was that twice a year my parents left on Saturday morning and didn't come back until the evening. They were using the Saturday sessions of conference to run away from us, and those were usually the days when the house was burned down or one of my siblings was locked in the closet for hours. <br /></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: left;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhU_S-EQ9Zcv4qoMq_sTJMV35SGg45gLUTAIdJGqN0suUhS43UKkgh5QQYVu9dGauBUIwjc9qz4lr7uPXnbItpDWo8Wyn8QjJ-C09HHs-VZM_YOp0t4fGR8qhoj-pNqSvfBgZaLXQZeUskn/s1600-h/179th_semiannual_general_conference.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; cssfloat: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img /></a>There was this rumor I used to hear about when I was younger, about this far off distant land, where people got to stay home and watch General Conference in their pajamas. When I finally had the chance to get voted onto the island, boy was it not what I thought it would be. First of all, when you watch Conference at church it's dark (they turn out the lights so you can see the screen, like in a movie theater), your parents can't tell if you have your eyes open or not, or if you are having a thumb war in the pew with your sister, but from home, oh no, they can see it all. My siblings and I had to come up with things like the "tie game." The tie game is when you wait for the knot of the tie of the person at the pulpit to be completely covered by the microphone.There are no winners or losers in this game. You don't even get points. You just sit, watching and waiting. With some speakers it gets so close and you are sure that it will cover the knot, but it never does, so you continue to watch and wait and then finally... there it is, no more knot.<br /></div><br /><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><img /><br /></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;">President Thomas S. Monson<br /></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;">President of <a href="http://www.lds.org/">The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints</a> <br /></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;">and perfect example of the "tie game"<br /></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: left;">To this day my parents are still fooled by the tie game. My parents would glance over at their reverent children starring intently at the speaker on screen, and a smile would cross their faces....little did they know. Now I know what some of you are thinking, poor broke kids, playing the tie game, so sad. It is sad! Why didn't somebody tell my Mama about General Conference bingo (I just barely found out about this!).<br /></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: left;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjkxxAPTomhS65E5iOEN2kaGjXKHJc2zbL127fg5o7nX8DK5ZbWQduEtKPDHRDSSdF4fKirPfpLOvu6UJ2qvWV8T0KuWv7JXhgZD52VyquupHqIjjE66IjYi2OjPpKnYeUwP8ovBj94Xkzx/s1600-h/GCBINGO.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; cssfloat: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img /></a>Now this game looks like fun! When you hear a speaker say one of the words on your card, you get to put an M&M on it and the first one to get five in a row whispers bingo. See that would have helped us pay attention, even though our bingo cards would have been pencil drawn on recycled notebook paper (and by recycled I mean the backside of an already used sheet of paper), and we would have been using rocks from the yard as bingo chips (cause my Mother doesn't let us play with food). It's ok though, because now I am all grown up and I don't need gimicks to keep me interested in Conference. I am focused, I am like the Rocky of General Conference, watching, my eye is on the tiger (I don't know if that's even right... I was heavily medicated when I saw that movie). Go ahead quiz me on anything! (side note: its an open book quiz, so you can't quiz me until the November issue of the Ensign is out).<br /></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: left;">Sista Laurel<br /></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: left;"><a href="http://www.myfreecopyright.com/registered_mcn/BT8QW_3GY41_YKT8E" title="MyFreeCopyright.com Registered & Protected"><img alt="MyFreeCopyright.com Registered & Protected" border="0" height="38" src="http://storage.myfreecopyright.com/mfc_protected.png" title="MyFreeCopyright.com Registered & Protected" width="145" /></a><br /></div>

The Tie Game

Today began the 179th Semiannual General Conference of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints . It also kicked off discussions all ...

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