SiZ (Test)

Primary the Mormon TMZ

<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg8Bh-aRUQphXHLlNBJfqogs2SKbDbzGyAOgW9NVEruCNsoxStzikBSBWxlx4a77i4RjkiD8tYvGNDXCddhqmyzrH7msoBUQGitITv12VLmwAWZjbtttbUIsJFTQDKckBfZaT4u8Y_Evwc/s1600/3.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="256" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg8Bh-aRUQphXHLlNBJfqogs2SKbDbzGyAOgW9NVEruCNsoxStzikBSBWxlx4a77i4RjkiD8tYvGNDXCddhqmyzrH7msoBUQGitITv12VLmwAWZjbtttbUIsJFTQDKckBfZaT4u8Y_Evwc/s320/3.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>We have both had callings in <a href="http://lds.org/pa/display/0,17884,4695-1,00.html">Primary</a> (<a href="http://www.lds.org/">LDS</a> Children's Sunday school.) Every church <a href="http://lds.about.com/od/organizationsauxiliaries/p/church_callings.htm">calling</a> allows you the opportunity to learn and grow. Here's a lesson we've learned through serving in Primary. If you are walking down the hall on a fine Sunday morning and somebody deliberately trips you causing you to fall on your face and break your nose. If you look up and the person that tripped you is your child's Primary teacher, just get up and keep walking. Don't even look em in the eye, you might even want to apologize to <i>them</i>.<br /><br />Look, here's the thing...even if you are known in your ward as the Grinch who stole Sunday, have some sense and at least be nice to your ward's Primary leaders and teachers. You may think you know why we are offering this crucial piece of advice. It's not because they are the poor souls who take your kids off your hands for two hours on a Sunday. It's not because they are the ones entrusted with your most prized possessions each week. It's not even because Jesus said love everyone, treat them kindly too, when your heart is filled with love, others will love you.<br /><br />The bottom line is this, be nice to the adults who serve in Primary because: THEY KNOW ALL YOUR BUSINESS! Yup, brothas and sistas, that's it. All of the information that you don't want to leave the house and all of the stuff that is supposed to stay in the family, forget about it, cause ya kids are spilling the beans in Primary. You may be thinking to yourself, not my children, my children are well trained, they know better than that. Nope, they don't.<br /><br />You see it's not intentional, and it usually happens quite innocently. A poor unsuspecting Primary teacher could ask a question as simple as: Can anyone tell me of a time when you have prayed and received an answer to your prayer? The next thing you know your son raises his hand and says: Once my Dad forgot his and my Mom's anniversary and my Mom was really mad and was slamming all the doors in the house. The teacher at this point might try to keep the child on topic and say: So you prayed that your Mommy would feel better and she did. Then your son says: Nope. Then the teacher says: You prayed that your Dad wouldn't forget their anniversary next year. And your son says: No, I prayed that she wouldn't slam the doors anymore because it was making my ears hurt. And it worked because she went outside and ran over Dad's golf clubs instead, and that didn't hurt my ears.<br /><br />A leader might ask, what did you do this past week? BAM! That's all the invitation your little <a href="http://www.sistasinzion.com/2011/04/lions-and-tigers-and-bedlamites-oh-my.html">bedlamite</a> needs to explain how Daddy grounded her older brother for life because Mommy and Daddy had to go get him from the jail, and Mommy says he's irr-ray-possible and can't drive the car anymore.<br /><br />TMZ, The National Enquirer, Google, they can all take a back seat, they can't get the scoop like these Primary <strike>reporters</strike> children can. Channel 8 news is probably lying when they say breaking news, we're bringing it to you first, cause chances are somebody in Primary told that headline weeks ago.<br /><br />So now we are all on notice. The next time you see your ward's Primary presidency and teachers, smile, say hi, shake their hand, give em a peice of chocolate, some hush money, do something, cause brothas and sistas...THEY KNOW ALL YOUR BUSINESS!<br /><br />Jesus is the reason,<br />Sista Beehive & Sista Laurel

Primary the Mormon TMZ

We have both had callings in Primary ( LDS Children's Sunday school.) Every church calling allows you the opportunity to learn and gr...

Another Mormon Musical

<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgW7opGWebKO6V5l7gX71hyphenhyphen6gAC9Q4ItsJF7hBKGUoNifH7Es86ndfRlmibgqTyzp5zvceIDjVz0ziy01EzhSJBxY2ITOOOsf8vcCyRZtGbofKbtJrIqvBkJeteKpBWJIHaFXiBchvUyWA/s1600/1.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="292px" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgW7opGWebKO6V5l7gX71hyphenhyphen6gAC9Q4ItsJF7hBKGUoNifH7Es86ndfRlmibgqTyzp5zvceIDjVz0ziy01EzhSJBxY2ITOOOsf8vcCyRZtGbofKbtJrIqvBkJeteKpBWJIHaFXiBchvUyWA/s400/1.jpeg" width="300px" /></a><br /><div style="text-align: left;">You've most likely heard of the Broadway musical, <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Book_of_Mormon_(musical)"><i>The Book of Mormon</i></a>, which raked in 14 Tony Award nominations. We haven't seen it, so we can't critique, but word on the streets is that <a href="http://www.mormon.org/">Mormon</a> or not, you either love it or hate it.</div><br /><div style="text-align: left;">Mormons are sizzling HOT right now! (If you're Mormon and you know it clap your hands...but be careful you might burn yourself.) Barrington Stage Company is getting ready to present <i><a href="http://www.barringtonstageco.org/currentseason/index-detail.php?record=145">Mormons, Mothers and Monsters</a>. </i>That's right folks, its another musical comedy with Mormon in the title.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">Popularity is a short ride. Like <strike>our good friend</strike> <a href="http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0005099/">Heidi Klum</a> says: "One day your in, the next day your out...Auf Wiedersehen." Who knows when Mormons will be back in style again, so we are thinking of producing a Mormon musical. Why shouldn't <a href="http://www.lds.org/">Latter-day Saints</a> get in on the Mormon Broadway action? Here are a few ideas we've tossed around. We'd love your thoughts on our play concepts and of course any new ideas would be greatly appreciated.</div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiv_mdCopwSISkcoKU6oeqOqHLdb5vUjH7l8oArYP-Nfr67aWxnDP99ZUAj8sE92gu3x7s7tKrCOno6KyC9wNRMUHDf3a9PqhQktJtAWZf4TUuBHCJkWx2HpsWGDxwNBYriDPpKzuqPImk/s1600/4.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400px" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiv_mdCopwSISkcoKU6oeqOqHLdb5vUjH7l8oArYP-Nfr67aWxnDP99ZUAj8sE92gu3x7s7tKrCOno6KyC9wNRMUHDf3a9PqhQktJtAWZf4TUuBHCJkWx2HpsWGDxwNBYriDPpKzuqPImk/s400/4.jpg" t8="true" width="260px" /></a></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><div style="text-align: left;">Twin sisters fall in love with the same <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Missionary_(LDS_Church)#Returned_missionaries">RM</a>. Ultimatley, because Mormons do not practice poligamy, the young man is forced to choose. The jilted sister becomes green with envy (literally!) and resorts to various wicked deeds in hopes of keeping the happy couple from reaching their Temple wedding date. Is there a happily ever after in this Mormon fairytale?</div></div><div style="text-align: left;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgPQqeAPJNn-QW1GLkxj8PYTT-VNgGb14d1m7fsRKgY0FcIM2Ek5X8wSiOkoCuw89hHJciLt9rVQWPEXmIRh5kK5EUbrSMImC6HMvc1kTVrQU48wHD4G9-gpP21w24uHNS5XWo_SJObcIw/s1600/5.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgPQqeAPJNn-QW1GLkxj8PYTT-VNgGb14d1m7fsRKgY0FcIM2Ek5X8wSiOkoCuw89hHJciLt9rVQWPEXmIRh5kK5EUbrSMImC6HMvc1kTVrQU48wHD4G9-gpP21w24uHNS5XWo_SJObcIw/s1600/5.jpg" t8="true" /></a></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><div style="text-align: left;">Mary is an over zealous <a href="http://lds.org/pa/display/0,17884,4691-1,00.html">visiting teacher</a> who can't keep a companion for the life of her. Further, she refuses to set appointments with the sisters she teaches and insits on surprise pop ins. This play is filled with delightful songs such as; Just a Spoon Full of Sugar Helps the Lesson Go Down, Mary Go Fly a Kite and SuperMormonFragalisticPleaseDontDressAtrocious.</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh0w66pXtwxlW9oiWfQEbEA4e4asZXFGIE5PZ6TeK0WQRMnqREWVl4slQqIl-aNg_nTrUjf7Ms6QYZWJnxfg7n_IMRmvuWi5zurW5yCPWunaihs51CejA-ZVSFtKaM_yW_R5hZ19_TT_j0/s1600/3.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400px" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh0w66pXtwxlW9oiWfQEbEA4e4asZXFGIE5PZ6TeK0WQRMnqREWVl4slQqIl-aNg_nTrUjf7Ms6QYZWJnxfg7n_IMRmvuWi5zurW5yCPWunaihs51CejA-ZVSFtKaM_yW_R5hZ19_TT_j0/s400/3.jpg" t8="true" width="286px" /></a></div><div align="center" style="text-align: justify;"><div style="text-align: left;">Brother von Trapp a Mormon widower with a lot of kids, grabs a container of <a href="http://www.sistasinzion.com/2009/10/cheerios-in-chapel.html">cherrios</a> and takes his family to listen to  <a href="http://www.musicandthespokenword.com/">Music and the Spoken Word</a> one Sunday morning. Amongst the hundreds of singers in the <a href="http://mormontabernaclechoir.org/">Mormon Tabernacle Choir</a> one voice stands out to him...Maria's. Maria is a lovely sister who loves nature and is always running through the hills, causing her to be late to choir practice. The other members of the choir decide that the only way to solve a problem like Maria, is to get her married, and Brother von Trapp seems to be just the right man. Guest appearance by <a href="http://mormontabernaclechoir.org/info/person?person_id=1">Lloyd Newell</a>.</div></div><div align="center" style="text-align: justify;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgwaeQDgG66GB-TpdneXsRcFLyzG-afATDjC9n13kcl7jlXl0ZrBhGfkEpsL4EKb-qrbp0p0HctWdLy-51TjDP1AwCJVYn_rLKvfzFoP3u4nJIkFSVD8jan4z40ovV7f0adfqLVfq3V0XY/s1600/3.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400px" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgwaeQDgG66GB-TpdneXsRcFLyzG-afATDjC9n13kcl7jlXl0ZrBhGfkEpsL4EKb-qrbp0p0HctWdLy-51TjDP1AwCJVYn_rLKvfzFoP3u4nJIkFSVD8jan4z40ovV7f0adfqLVfq3V0XY/s400/3.jpg" t8="true" width="281px" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">If you don't know this storyline, check it out <a href="http://www.sistasinzion.com/2011/04/diary-of-mad-black-mormon.html">here</a>. The idea would be to somehow make each diary entry rhyme, and then set them to music.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: justify;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: justify;">See you at the Tonys!</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: justify;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: justify;">Peace and Happiness,</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: justify;">Sista Beehive & Sista Laurel</div></div>

Another Mormon Musical

You've most likely heard of the Broadway musical, The Book of Mormon , which raked in 14 Tony Award nominations. We haven't seen it,...

Caption This!

We found this over at AkwardFamilyPhotos.com and we bet our bottom dollar they are Mormon . Ok peeps, caption this photo.

Have I done any Good In His/Her World Today?

<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj4wWR-ek8A5sVBq9tmkgoYge6NWBcuTStAzqNSDS7rin-dBDdvP6yoNdkoCNhi5CeEV-zwvG8LMo0OvDBd0EQjT4QR_R6dRHPjD_eZ7OpGVDzjqob1O79M06rnfyFx5N36tAqWc2kHZgY/s1600/black-children-endangered-species.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj4wWR-ek8A5sVBq9tmkgoYge6NWBcuTStAzqNSDS7rin-dBDdvP6yoNdkoCNhi5CeEV-zwvG8LMo0OvDBd0EQjT4QR_R6dRHPjD_eZ7OpGVDzjqob1O79M06rnfyFx5N36tAqWc2kHZgY/s400/black-children-endangered-species.jpg" width="282" /></a>What did I do to help shape his/her world today? This is a question mothers and mother-figures often ask themselves. The discussion of motherhood seems to arouse strong emotions in us. We all come to the discussion with our own personal experience, yet one thing that we can all agree on is the relationship (or lack thereof) between a mother and a child is a vital part of helping to shape us. And how we see ourselves in the world.<br /><br />The relationship with our mother often establishes a pattern of future relationships.Which is why many of us will sit in church today silently battling the internal conflict of the “Good” mother. As Sista LaKeysha (a safe name for us because there isn’t a LaKeysha in our wards...currently) stands up today and shares how wonderful her mother was. You’ve heard it before:<br /><br />“I’m so grateful for my wonderful mother and the example she was to me growing up. Everyday when my 12 brothers and sisters and I came home from school, my mother had fresh baked cookies for us with a cup of freshly squeezed milk from our family cow Daisy. She got her Ph.D. from BYU in Early Childhood Education with a minor in Psychology, just so she could be of aide to her children when we needed her. I don’t know what I would have done without the love and support of my wonderful mother…"<br /><br />C'mon Sistas, sit up a little higher in those seats. Please stop beating yourselves up because you weren’t like Sista LaKeysha’s mother. The person we make our mothers out to be in our adult minds are often very different from the mother we had as young children, and that person is different from the mother we had in our pre-teen and teen years. The point is, we should no more beat ourselves up over Sista LaKeysha’s experience than we should over Sista Becky’s. Whose story we may have heard as well:<br /><br />“Hello, I’m Becky and I honestly don’t know why the Bishop asked me to speak today. Ummm, and I really don’t know why he asked me to speak right after Sista LaKeysha, because our lives couldn’t have been more different. Ummm, I really struggle with Mother's Day. I didn’t have the best mom growing up.  My mother was emotionally and physically abusive. She had some addictions and we often went without because of her issues. She often left my two brothers and I in adverse situations that were beyond our control. If it weren’t for the mercy of strangers our lives may have turned out completely different. My number one goal was to be completely different then she was, and I am…!"<br /><br />Okay, that was a bit dramatic. However, just as you shouldn’t celebrate not being like Sista Becky’s mother, you shouldn’t beat yourself up for not being like Sista LaKeysha’s mother. As we start down the rocky path of motherhood most of us have no idea what is going to be asked of us in the process of parenting another one of God’s children. Even when we start that journey with the best of intentions, the entire process holds countless surprises. Some women can’t wait to be mothers and then realize too late they probably should have waited. Some women wait then realize they could have started earlier (we don’t know that person, but one of you might). The reality is being a mother offers up multiple opportunities for helping or hindering our children toward adulthood.<br /><br />As mothers we have many truths (not really, but we believe them to be true). When children behave inappropriately (in public), it’s the mother’s fault. When children are well behaved, it’s because they were brought up “right”. Because of the widespread tendency within our culture to blame the mother, it's common for those of us who have braved the rapid waves of mothering to live with haunting questions about what we did or did not do in shaping our children's lives. "Mother's guilt" is a common ailment, especially among LDS Women. Whether you have mild, infrequent discomfort or full anxiety attacks, very few women (even those who don’t have children) escape “Mother's guilt.”<br /><br />The truth is, motherhood (womanhood) is difficult. For some, the demands of both are met with ease; for others, the demands are simply too much. We are the bridge between generations. It is wise for us to try to remember and be merciful towards those who have and still stumble as they continue trying to establish a foundation on motherhood. Also, we should celebrate with our sistas who seemingly have it figured out as they soar beyond the limitations we may have set for ourselves.<br /><br />Today it is wise to remember the women who have influenced our lives with some justice (Lest we deceive ourselves, setting standards that would make even Mary the mother of Jesus feel inadequate), but mostly mercy. Because we are all simply doing the best we can with what we've been given. As our MoDea (Mormon Madea) says “When you know better, you do better.” Here is to wishing us all better days ahead.<br /><br />Happy Mothers Day,<br />Sista Beehive and Sista Laurel

Have I done any Good In His/Her World Today?

What did I do to help shape his/her world today? This is a question mothers and mother-figures often ask themselves. The discussion of mothe...

That Ain't Right!

<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjuZaWDnOKOq2dbCPgQ5htZzBKPxWOqHV9SVThYUvGY7ae66uilkNs-tDu_aZfr7tAK-nW4mUiK5Q9Nk-nVrqWGC4yRyXf5aLK9vkDUXpQEQckmyAbnVusYau5LzxATc3bc9OrKvsOn6WM/s1600/1.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; cssfloat: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" j8="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjuZaWDnOKOq2dbCPgQ5htZzBKPxWOqHV9SVThYUvGY7ae66uilkNs-tDu_aZfr7tAK-nW4mUiK5Q9Nk-nVrqWGC4yRyXf5aLK9vkDUXpQEQckmyAbnVusYau5LzxATc3bc9OrKvsOn6WM/s1600/1.png" /></a>Once we were visiting a Baptist church with some friends. The Pastor was giving a sermon on…well we aren’t exactly sure. At some point he began a tangent we like to call "That ain't right."<br /><br />It went a little something like this: If yo Priest lives in the big house and ya parishioners live in the po house, that ain't right! If the Reverend has a chef, and the congregation eats whatever's left, that ain't right! If ma Minister got a real nice suit, and all the church folk got holes in they shoes, that ain't right!<br /><br />Then he looked right over at us and said, if the Bishop got a BMW spinnin' on dubs (fancy rims) and the members drive a Pinto that needs a jump start and a shove, THAT AIN'T RIGHT! Whaaat! We looked at each other, we looked at the Pastor, was he for real trying to call us out for being <a href="http://www.mormon.org/">Mormon</a> in front of the entire congregation. <br /><br />Another time at a different church the Reverend was inviting people to come up to be prayed for. When no one was coming up on their own the Reverend decided to call for those who needed prayers. <br /><br />It went a little something like this: This young sister right here is 20 years old has three kids, two baby daddies and a one baby on the way, let us pray for her. Church this brother came into my office and said Reverend, I have transgressed. Church do you remember that he has been in AA? Well he has not been attending his meetings and just this morning he had a sip. Let us pray.<br /><br />This got us thinking how glad we are that the <a href="http://www.lds.org/">LDS</a> church does not have a portion of Sacrament meeting where we can share other peoples business or call people out. Can you even imagine it! You know that sister or brother in your ward that gets up every <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Worship_services_of_The_Church_of_Jesus_Christ_of_Latter-day_Saints#Fast_and_testimony_meeting">Fast and Testimony Meeting</a> and tells all their business and we're all thinking TMI, TMI, TMI! Well imagine if they could tell yo business.<br /><br />It would probably go a little something like this: I just wanted to take this opportunity to share my testimony. I'm grateful for the Word of Wisdom and how it has been a protection to me and my family, let me be the first to admit that I struggle with the need to drink a diet coke occasionally, but it is nothing compared to the trials that Brother Brown and his family have to deal with because of his addiction to alcohol.<br /><br />I promised myself I wasn't going to do this, (as she starts to do the <a href="http://lds.org/pa/display/0,17884,4689-1,00.html">Relief Society</a> fan and cry) but I'm so grateful for Sister Leak, she is such an example to me of the type of mother I'd like to be to my children. I mean, she makes it look so easy raising all those children alone. I don't think I would be strong enough to send my children to their fathers (plural) homes knowing that they were being taught things there that are contrary to what we believe. But she has faith that things are going to work out and that Heavenly Father is aware of their needs and she has been right so far. She is such an amazing example of a woman of faith. I know that if I can learn to have faith like her, that Heavenly Father will remember and not forget me.<br /><br />Brothers and Sisters, as Bishop, I am shocked at the long pauses between testimonies. There are many of you here who have had your testimonies strengthened just this week. For instance you there Sister Jones, the Lord has blessed you, the DNA test could have gone the other way, but it did not. You and Brother Jones are now blessed with a family. Come up and testify of how God answers fervent prayers.<br /><br />Let's all take a deep breath and on the count of three say it together...1-2-3, That Ain't Right!!! Like our Aunty use to say, "If the Lord ain't talking about it, neither should you!"<br /><br />God is Great,<br />Sista Beehive & Sista Laurel

That Ain't Right!

Once we were visiting a Baptist church with some friends. The Pastor was giving a sermon on…well we aren’t exactly sure. At some point he be...

J. Golden Kimball, A Very Funny Mormon

<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEghB9xs7zCyil6pyoiVgBRcAYEt4cO654ZBSCo4PHKvr6CrGUL00EAMj30I7QxuXGr42EjfefKFklpgbj3EUwVnEfTsfflLVCU0IkPLLhddTWGpvgF_1S1H6QwnPX-ne2rTH4_baT_8bck/s1600/3.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; cssfloat: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" i8="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEghB9xs7zCyil6pyoiVgBRcAYEt4cO654ZBSCo4PHKvr6CrGUL00EAMj30I7QxuXGr42EjfefKFklpgbj3EUwVnEfTsfflLVCU0IkPLLhddTWGpvgF_1S1H6QwnPX-ne2rTH4_baT_8bck/s200/3.jpg" width="132" /></a>Our non-LDS readers may not know this, but <a href="http://www.lds.org/">LDS</a> Church leaders are actually known to have keen senses of humor. One of the funniest in our opinion is <a href="http://www.gapages.com/kimbajg1.htm">J. Golden Kimball</a>. There are many funny stories and quotes attributed to him and we don't know which stories are 100% accurate and which are <a href="http://www.mormon.org/">Mormon</a> folklore but we do know they are hilarious, here are a few:<br /><br />There was to be an impressive tour given to some dignitaries from other lands. J. Golden Kimball was assigned to the tour as a guide. They first took a bus trip to the important historical sites in and around Salt Lake City. Brother Kimball would constantly remind the visitors how fast buildings were put up by the industrious Mormons. Every time he would say so, one of the dignitaries on the tour would say, "Oh, is that right? In our country we could do it in half the time." J. Golden began to get madder and madder as the dignitary persisted to offer such comments. The tour was to end by having the bus drive around Temple Square. Then this dignitary asked, "What is that building there?" as he pointed at the Temple. "Damned if I know," said J. Golden. "It wasn't there yesterday." (<a href="http://wabei4.tripod.com/kimball/golden02.htm">http://wabei4.tripod.com/kimball/golden02.htm</a>)<br /><br />The story is told that someone stopped Elder J. Golden Kimball on the street on one occasion. There had been a little difficulty in Elder Kimball's family that had become publicly known, and whoever it was who stopped him, no doubt with a mind to injure, said, ' Brother Kimball, I understand you're having some problems with one of your children.' His answer was, ' Yes, and the Lord is having some problems with some of his, too.' (<a href="http://wabei4.tripod.com/kimball/golden12.htm">http://wabei4.tripod.com/kimball/golden12.htm</a>)<br /><br />President Grant sent a note to Golden. The note read that there was a member of the stake presidency from Coalville, who had passed away. His wife had requested Golden speak at the funeral. Golden didn’t get the note until he returned from a Church assignment in Southern California. By then the funeral was in an hour, and Coalville was almost two hours away He hopped in his Model T and drove as fast as he could. When he arrived, the funeral was almost over. The bishop saw Golden walk in. "Brother Kimball, come forward. We’d like to hear from you." <br /><br />He went up and said, "I’m very happy to be here. I’m sorry I’m late. I want to tell you what a wonderful person this man was. I knew him, I’ve stayed in his home. He was an inspiration to me. He was a good father, he was a good husband. He goes to a great reward." As he started to hit his stride, he looked out in the audience. About the eighth row back, there sat the man he thought was dead! So he looked down in the casket. He did not recognize the man lying there. Confused, he turned and said, "Say Bishop, who the hell’s dead around here anyway?" (<a href="http://wabei4.tripod.com/kimball/golden14.htm">http://wabei4.tripod.com/kimball/golden14.htm</a>)<br /><br />Be Blessed and Highly Favored, <br />Sista Beehive & Sista Laurel

J. Golden Kimball, A Very Funny Mormon

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